How to Control Your Anger at Work

How to Control Your Anger at Work

October 3, 2019

Posted by

Jess Sexton

Sharp flashes of anger can well up in absolutely anyone – even the most mild-mannered of us are not immune. It’s a powerful emotion! Being ready for anger, understanding how to quell it, and learning how to harness and channel it into something productive is paramount to workplace success, as well as your overall mental health.

Get Anger Flares Under Control

Maybe a problem has been itching at you for days (or weeks!) without your notice. All you know is that you are mad, and you want to channel that anger. Refrain from doing so in this moment! Acting while your anger is piqued will only worsen the situation, potentially damaging your workplace relationships and hurting the team, as well as the quality of your work.

Before you act rashly, use these tips to simmer down in order to reduce stress, conquer anger, and solve problems.

  • Take a moment to acknowledge your anger – You will not find a healthy way to work through your anger if you refuse to accept that you are angry. Learn your personal tells, and if you catch yourself doing them – or someone else does – then you can step back and evaluate your anger.

  • Use visualization – Think about how you look in this moment. Maybe even grab a mirror! Do you like how your aggression looks on you? Likely not. Examining how you are coming across can be a great way to understand that you’ve hit the boiling point, and it is time to remove yourself from the situation for a bit.

  • Take deep breaths and think through your frustration – Rapid, shallow breathing is an anger tell for nearly everyone, and it’s an action that feeds into your frustration. Slow your breathing and concentrate—force your body to physically de-escalate so that your mind can do the same.

  • If your anger is extreme, consider a walk or a break – Sometimes breathing exercises aren’t going to cut it. If your flash of anger leaves you seeing red and rational thought has left the building completely, it is likely time to step away. Take a walk around the block, sit in a dark and quiet room, or grab a snack so that your mind has time to process your stress.

Identify the Source of Your Anger

Anger can arise from a variety of sources, and to gain control of it – not just suppress it – you need to identify the source. Once you’re no longer in danger of flying off the handle, figure out what set you off. Are you frustrated with a co-worker? Did your management expect something of you that you feel is unfair?

Whatever the cause, once you’re calm enough, it’s best to work toward a resolution. If possible, don’t do it alone! Take advantage of neutral parties, such as your team leader or an HR member. Often a neutral party can help to mediate so that flare-ups aren’t likely to happen again.

Understand a Healthy Workplace Culture

Do you wrestle with anger frequently in your workplace? Is this the only workplace where you’ve dealt with anger spikes? A healthy work environment is something that absolutely everyone deserves. This means a workplace that offers reasonable workloads, plenty of employee support, and a place that focuses on synergy and overall employee health.

If your workplace is decidedly not any of these things, the best remedy for your frustration may be to work toward finding a place that puts you in your best moods and emotions, rather than your most destructive.

The next time you feel a spike of anger, own it, step back, breathe, and take a break. You’ll find yourself level-headed and ready to solve problems again in no time!

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